Mary Oliver

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?"









Wednesday, July 5, 2017

Loose Ends

I find myself at loose ends these days.  This often happens to me on summer break; without a schedule, I tend to let the days slip by without a plan, in part, as a way to rest and relax.  But after a bit, I usually start feeling a little blue.  This summer is the first summer I have ever lived completely alone, and when I think about it in those terms, I am doing pretty well.  And yet, there are times when I'm so apathetic and listless, that I worry that I'm not coping as well as it seems.  I can't decide if I should put more structure in my days or if floating along is what I need.  I have been reading quite a bit, and continue to do a little yard work most days, but I haven't committed to doing any major projects around the house like I had planned.  I'm not closing myself off from my friends and family, but I'm definitely not as social as I was.  As an example, this is the first summer since I moved in nine years ago, that I haven't actively invited friends and coworkers over for Beach Fridays, and I can't really say why.  I have had a very few close friends come over for beach time, the ones who are close enough to invite themselves, and I've enjoyed it, but I just don't feel like doing the hostess thing.  So much has been written about the curated on-line selves we present, that I thought it was important to be honest about some of the not so pretty stuff.  Thanks for listening.  Now on to the pictures.
 
This is a rose from one of the bushes I pruned last week; I have a couple of these antique bottles and was happy to have a reason to use one of them.  
 I'm not sure if I've ever posted a photo of this part of my front yard before, but I took this picture after pruning this tree.  Again, I really wish I had a before photo, as this tree was a beast.  I don't know what it is, but I call it a weeping holly because prior to my pruning it, its branches hung down to the ground like a weeping willow.  This is the first time I've ever seen the ground around it!
 
Melissa went to Colorado and Wyoming last month, and brought back this tea towel from a vintage shop.  I think it's adorable.
 
 I finished the Playground Shawl for my friend; this is a picture of it before blocking.
 
 
 
And this is how it grew after blocking.  I was amazed at the size, until I checked my yardage again and realized I had used 680 yards of yarn.  
         
 And in an effort to work from my stash, I cast on another shawl right away.  This will be much smaller, as it's a single skein shawl.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Gracie continues to enjoy sitting near me as much as possible while she naps, often on the arm of the couch.
 
 
And sometimes, she rests her tiny head on my knee.
 
But usually she loves to scrunch down on the back of the couch where it's a cushier place to snuggle.  
 
Hoping you are well and keeping as cool as you can in this hot, dry summer we're having.  And thanks again for stopping by.

11 comments:

  1. I like to let the days flow by in the summer but I do find that if I let it go too long I fall into that "house mouse" mentality! It's wonderful that you can be spontaneous in having good friends drop by - I'm sure you're still a welcoming hostess even if things aren't planned. Gracie just makes me smile; her face is very dear!

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    1. Liza, I think that's definitely true. Thanks for commenting, and Gracie says hi!

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  2. Love the vintage towel! And Gracie, of course.

    I've found that when I know I am going to have blocks of time I always "plan" and think about what I'm going to accomplish and then do nothing! So, maybe a lazy summer is exactly what you need. I would just take the days as they come and enjoy them.

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    1. Thank you, Vera, for your suggestion. I agree, it's a good idea to have a plan. I think my concerns are really more about adjusting to being the only person responsible for everything, especially financially, after a ten year period of feeling like I had a partner, even if it turned out to be untrue. I have been single before and believe that everything will turn out okay, it's just once in a while the insecurity catches up with me. Thanks again for being so supportive and Gracie says hello!

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  3. Your first paragraph described my entire Winter/Spring/early Summer. I completely understand the feelings you share. My problem was different than yours, as I shared over at my place, but the emotions are the same.

    My little holiday away helped me immensely; it seemed a change of scenery was just what I needed. For you, maybe changing things up would help you as well.

    I think you're making a Big Difference to your yard and home! You're doing Good Things.

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    2. Thank you; I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment! We all have struggles at times in our lives, don't we? It's comforting to remember that when we begin to feel we are the only ones. I'm so looking forward to my two weeks in NYC starting next week, as I totally agree with you about a change of scenery! Take care.

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  4. I often feel like the summer days get away from me. I think that's part of having such an intense work year!
    And you don't live alone; you live with Gracie! Seriously, Keith lived alone for a long time, and really fell in love with cats when one stumbled into his life.
    I think you are right to go with the flow. If you feel like reviving Beach Fridays at some point, you will. You are still going through a huge adjustment.
    And thanks so much for the card! It means a lot to me.

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    1. I think you're right about the job affecting our summer. There were many years I would get some type of illness as soon as school let out, and I think it was a way for my body to force me to slow down and recover. I'm sending positive thoughts your way as you deal with your medical issue; sounds like it's going as well as it can, so I'm hoping that continues.

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  5. Rose,
    Why don't you consider driving north and visiting with us here at our new house on the north shore of Lake Ontario? Yes, it's an official invitation from one blogger to another! We are having an unusually cool, wet summer, a relief after last year's hot, dry one. Did you know that you can take the ferry from the US to Canada (departs Cape Vincent, NY)?

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    1. Oh my goodness, that is incredibly kind of you! I would absolutely love to visit, but I don't think I'll be able to this summer. For one thing, I need a new passport, but also, I leave this Thursday for almost two weeks in Brooklyn to visit my daughter. Mostly, I am going to pet sit for her, and I'm afraid that's all the time I can be away. My mom has been having some health issues and I need to be able to help her and my dad out as much as I can before I go back to work in August. But I truly appreciate your kind and generous offer, and I'll be sure to get my new passport so I'm ready next summer, in case you extend the invitation to me again! Thank you so very much!

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